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  • WhatYouNeed@lemmy.world
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    16 days ago

    Build a large wall around the entire perimeter of the property.

    Construct a tall stone tower in the middle of the property and paint it completely matt black.

    Poison the land around the tower, so nothing, not even grass can grow.

    Have packs of wild, feral dogs roam the property.

    Dress in dark grey robes, and spend the rest of your days on the top of the tower, screaming obscenities at any passers-by, or shaking your fist angryly at the sky.

    • Prehensile_cloaca @lemm.ee
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      16 days ago

      *Mount a fiery red spotlight at the top of the tower and move the beam randomly around the property in case of hobbits

    • Geobloke@lemm.ee
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      15 days ago

      Move the stone wall out each night and slowly claim more land like an insidious virus