Some kaiju-sized demon could cleave Tampa, Florida in half with a flaming sword of the damned and all twitter would have to say about it is “would.”
> kaiju demon cleaves Tampa > prehistoric kaiju sized mega-crocodile erupts from crack in ground > they battle it out, croczilla wins by continuous death rolling > "Oh I must have switched on the sci-fy channel by accident" > mfw its national news station with live coverage
Twitter: “lmao this new retcon of Godzilla is wild”Kaiju coming to Florida, eating some elderly people and their scooters, some swamp felons with their fentanyl patches and deciding to go back into the sea.
“Next time I’m going to Canada, the people here are wild and I’m starting to feel really…”
You know the movie “The end”? With Seth Rogan etc.
BIG DEMON PENIS XD
Maybe Satan isn’t all that bad a guy and he was banished to a place for eternity that doesn’t really bother him
and maybe this is why we are sent to hell … we are Satan’s punishment … we are sent there to torture Satan for eternity
So Satan sets the place on fire and tries to burn all of us to try to kill us but we are undead and keep asking him why and send him texts of ‘lol’
Guys, Bible 2.0 just dropped
SUBSCRIBE
Why would some people be sent to heaven, though?
They weren’t annoying enough to send to hell as punishment for Satan, and God thought they’d be cool to hang out with.
I think they’re just toys in God’s creep collection
The God of the Old Testament is an absolute monster, so I automatically like the guy who opposed him more.
I really like the Gnostic belief that this God is the “demiurge”… a lesser, malevolent, ignorant and false god who created the material world as a flawed imitation of the divine realm. He traps human souls in matter, while the true, transcendent God remains distant and unknowable. Some gnostics see the serpent as the good guy for encouraging Adam and Eve to eat the fruit of knowledge and free humanity from the ignorance of Yaldabaoth, the blind fool god, very much like Morpheus in The Matrix (which adapts all kinds of ideas from Gnosticism).
Would I die soyjacking to a demon? Yes.
Would it be funny? Also yes.
Maybe they make great pets?
Or maybe they taste good?
I would rather have satan in control than god if this world is what god did for us.
Really no way to tell which is which if you’re going by the contents of the book other than the more powerful one saying they’re the good one. They both lie, kill, etc.
Half of Lemmy: “Oh no, please, don’t destroy my asshole 🤤”
Demon: “I am here to annihilate humanity! Hello? Please stop it… You’re making this really awkward…”
Trust me, you wouldn’t want to lose your virginity to a 9 dicked demon - Jerry Jones
Don’t tell me how to live my life Jerry jones
It’s all smiles and glory holes down here
Anyone else think the sodomy demon kinda looks like Grimace?
Holy shit
When the demons realise humans have come a long way from the last time they showed up and start seeing demon ivory on ebay.
Flayed skin fetish bots
TFW OP posted this literally one hour after a dire wolf meme was dumped in 196 Blahaj
Wtf, Where is from?
Devilman crybaby. The joke is more about how he’s standing at the head of the church like a priest.
Isn’t armageddon from Norse mythology? Or am I confused with another thing
Armageddon is a Christian thing, you’re thinking of Ragnarok
In some manga the bad guys announce they will annihilate humanity, and they will start by killing 1000 people every day(!!!). At that rate, it would take them 22000 years to kill 8billion
It would not even be possible to annihilate humanity if you kill a 1000 people a day.
About 368000 people are born daily. About 150000 die daily. Which means the bad guys would have to kill about 219000 people per day to annihilate humanity in 22000 years
